Journals of a Love Addict
The Podcast
Do you…
Continually find yourself in dysfunctional relationships?
Undervalue yourself while putting others on a pedestal?
Have a pattern of dating emotionally unavailable partners?
Yes? I can totally relate.
On my podcast, Journals of a Love Addict, I share my personal journey through love addiction recovery, and my experience as a therapist.
I also talk with others who have struggled, as well as experts in trauma, addiction, and other areas of mental health.
My hope is to help listeners feel less alone as I spread awareness of what love addiction is really all about.
Music by JD Pendley
Episode 51: Sketchy Psychics
In this episode, my friend Brooke and I share stories of seeking comfort from psychics, why we might look for guidance in such places, and put so much trust in someone we don't even know.
When an addictive relationship ends, we can find ourselves feeling wobbly, uncertain, and very vulnerable. We might seek therapy, the help of a support group, or even guidance from someone who SAYS they have the solution to our problem and can make the pain go away.
In this episode, my friend Brooke and I share stories of seeking comfort from psychics, why we might look for guidance in such places, and put so much trust in someone we don't even know.
Show notes & resources:
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Link to more information about The JOLA Network (Jodi's online recovery community): https://jodiwhite.jolanetwork.com/
Link to Jodi’s upcoming online Mother Hunger® Group beginning in September
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 50: A Recovery Story with Heidi Kingston, LCSW
In this episode, I talk with another therapist in recovery, Heidi Kingston, regarding her personal experience with love addiction, the ups and downs of her own recovery journey, and what she's learned along the way.
We often think of recovery as something we start, and then everything gets better. But everyone's path to recovery is unique, and truth is that once we do get started, things might actually get harder before they get easier.
In this epsiode, I talk with another therapist in recovery, Heidi Kingston, regarding her personal experience with love addiction, the ups and downs of her own recovery journey, and what she's learned along the way.
Show notes & resources:
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Link to more information about The JOLA Network (Jodi's online recovery community): https://jodiwhite.jolanetwork.com/
Pia Mellody books referenced: Facing Love Addiction and Breaking Free
The Meadows workshop referenced: Survivors
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 49: Going Deeper with Heather Cronemiller
In this episode, I talk with Heather Cronemiller, a therapist in recovery and co-author of "Going Deeper For Women: How The Inner Child Impacts Your Sex & Love Addiction". Heather shares her experience with fantasy and the search for a soulmate, and what ultimately led her into recovery.
Fantasy plays a big part in the cycle of love addiction; and for many of us, using fantasy to escape discomfort starts early in life. This, acommpanied with the idea of a prince charming or soulmate as presented to us in childhood fairy tales, has a powerful impact on how we see ourselves, and what we look for in relationships.
In this episode, I talk with Heather Cronemiller, a therapist in recovery and co-author of "Going Deeper For Women: How The Inner Child Impacts Your Sex & Love Addiction". Heather shares her experience with fantasy and the search for a soulmate, and what ultimately led her into recovery.
Show notes & resources:
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Link to more information about The JOLA Network (Jodi's online recovery community): https://jodiwhite.jolanetwork.com/
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 48: Pain Shopping
In this episode, my friend, Brooke, and I discuss the concepts of pain shopping and comfort-seeking behaviors; and share our personal experiences with both.
In love addiction, we have an issue with reality. In other words, we tend to ignore the data that's often right in front of us, and might even seek 'different' data elsewhere--something that could possibly soothe us, but often hurts us.
In this episode, my friend, Brooke, and I discuss the concepts of pain shopping and comfort-seeking behaviors; and share our personal experiences with both.
Show notes & resources:
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Link to more information about The JOLA Network (Jodi's online recovery community): https://jodiwhite.jolanetwork.com/
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 47: A Therapist's Story with Leah Hoffman
It can be easy to assume that therapists have it together in life and relationships, but when it comes to attachment--and love addiction--no one is immune. And because hearing from a therapist who 'gets it' can be very helpful for those of us in recovery, I invited therapist and coach, Leah Hoffman, to the podcast to share her recent experience with the cycle of love addiction and what she's learned from it.
It can be easy to assume that therapists have it together in life and relationships, but when it comes to attachment--and love addiction--no one is immune. And because hearing from a therapist who 'gets it' can be very helpful for those of us in recovery, I invited therapist and coach, Leah Hoffman, to the podcast to share her recent experience with the cycle of love addiction and what she's learned from it.
Show notes & resources:
Leah's website: coachingwithleah.com
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 46: Setting Boundaries That Stick with Jules Taylor Shore
In this episode, I talk with therapist and boundaries expert Juliane (Jules) Taylor Shore about her new book, "Setting Boundaries That Stick" (you may remember Jules from EP31, "All About Boundaries"). Jules shares six steps to setting an external boundary, the importance of a pause and paying attention to feelings, why hard conversations are so challenging, why we struggle with self-compassion, and why growth comes with grief.
One of the hard parts of recovery--and life--is having difficult conversations, especially those that come with a chance of discord, being seen as the 'bad guy', or simply feeling uncomfortable. When confronted with having hard conversations, it can seem 'easier' to avoid them...but also less functional, and avoiding can lead to resentment and feeling stuck.
But there's good reason for the discomfort: In this episode of the podcast, I talk about this with therapist and boundaries expert Juliane (Jules) Taylor Shore and her new book, "Setting Boundaries That Stick" (you may remember Jules from EP31, "All About Boundaries"). Jules shares six steps to setting an external boundary, as well as the importance of a pause and paying attention to feelings; why hard conversations are so challenging; why we struggle with self-compassion, and why growth comes with grief.
Show notes & resources:
Information about Jules Taylor Shore and her Instagram.
Purchase "Setting Boundaries That Stick" by Jules Taylor Shore
EP31: All About Boundaries with Jules Taylor Shore
Music by JD Pendley
Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
Disclaimer: This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.
Episode 41: The Three Whys with Nicole Lewis-Keeber
You may have heard about the importance of your 'why'--that thing that motivates you and provides a sense of purpose in life and work. But what if that concept was broken down even further, into three parts that took you deeper into that 'why'?
You may have heard about the importance of your 'why'--that thing that motivates you and provides a sense of purpose in life and work. But what if that concept was broken down even further, into three parts that took you deeper into that 'why'?
Nicole Lewis-Keeber (therapist, coach & author) has done just that, and she talks with me in this episode of the podcast about The Three Whys. I also share an early experience that took me away from my Why, and a little about the process of getting back to it.
Episode 40: That Therapist with Dr. Lara Dye
If you're a listener of the podcast, then you've heard me talk about 'that therapist'--the one I worked with in 2016, who taught me about love addiction, supported me through withdrawal, and played a vital role in my early recovery. That therapist is Dr. Lara Dye. And, because she was such an important part of my recovery journey, I invited Dr. Dye to talk with me for this episode of the podcast.
If you're a listener of the podcast, then you've heard me talk about 'that therapist'--the one I worked with in 2016, who taught me about love addiction, supported me through withdrawal, and played a vital role in my early recovery.
That therapist is Dr. Lara Dye, a Pia Mellody-trained psychologist specializing in love & sex addiction, who also has personal experience with love addiction recovery. And, because she was such an important part of my recovery journey, I invited Dr. Dye to talk with me for this episode of the podcast.
Episode 39: Intimacy Intolerance with Kelly McDaniel
What is intimacy? If you Google the term you might find varying--yet similar--definitions...but what does it mean to YOU?
What is intimacy? If you Google the term you might find varying--yet similar--definitions...but what does it mean to YOU?
In this episode, Kelly McDaniel (author of "Ready to Heal" and "Mother Hunger") is back to talk with me regarding what intimacy really is, and the reason why in love addiction--although we might crave closeness--we struggle to tolerate authentic intimacy.
Episode 38: Pretty Baby (A Mother Hunger Conversation)
Have you seen the Hulu documentary, "Pretty Baby: Brooke Shields"? It paints a powerful portrait of Brooke's sexualization as a child actor, and brings attention to the waters in which young women swim from a young age. On this episode of the podcast, I’m joined by my friend, Brooke, to discuss "Pretty Baby" through the lens of Mother Hunger (because we can't understand love addiction without talking about Mother Hunger).
Have you seen the Hulu documentary, "Pretty Baby: Brooke Shields"? It paints a powerful portrait of Brooke's sexualization as a child actor, and brings attention to the waters in which young women swim from a young age. In this docuseries, Brooke Shields discusses the highs and lows of her career, and provides insight into the complex relationship with her mother.
On this episode of the podcast, I’m joined by my friend, Brooke, to discuss "Pretty Baby" through the lens of Mother Hunger (because we can't understand love addiction without talking about Mother Hunger). Even if you haven't watched the documentary, you'll get something out of this one.
Episode 37: A Case of Cathexis
In love addiction we often feel like we're in love, but is it really love? And what is genuine love, anyway?
In this episode, I discuss the concept of cathexis--the thing we often confuse with genuine love--and the role it played in my love addiction.
In love addiction we often feel like we're in love, but is it really love? And what is genuine love, anyway?
In this episode, I discuss the concept of cathexis--the thing we often confuse with genuine love--and the role it played in my love addiction. I also share a recent painful experience that forced me to slow down in order to examine (and accept) reality, and to embrace the grief that came with all of it.
Episode 36: You Are Not Stuck with Becky Vollmer
Do you ever feel like what you're doing in the world isn't aligned with who you are? Like maybe you're going through the motions of 'supposed to' instead of living from your true purpose? If so, you're not alone...
Do you ever feel like what you're doing in the world isn't aligned with who you are? Like maybe you're going through the motions of 'supposed to' instead of living from your true purpose? If so, you're not alone...
In this episode I talk with Becky Vollmer about her new book, "You Are Not Stuck: How Soul-Guided Choices Transform Fear Into Freedom" which provides relatable steps for getting back to authenticity. We also discuss our similar experiences with first careers; the importance of knowing what we do and don't value; and how yoga can help us tap into our True Self.
Episode 33: Dirty Secrets
In this episode, my friend, Brooke, joins me to talk about the recent Victoria's Secret documentary; and how the company's marketing in the early 2000s led to confusing messages about beauty and furthered the cultural double bind women experience.
In love addiction recovery, we focus a lot on developmental trauma and what took place in our family of origin (because looking at our history is important). But there's something else that plays a role in love addiction: cultural messaging.
In this episode, my friend, Brooke, joins me to talk about the recent Victoria's Secret documentary; and how the company's marketing in the early 2000s led to confusing messages about beauty and furthered the cultural double bind women experience.
Brooke and I also share personal experiences about sexual harassment, body insecurity, and how uncomfortable it is to talk about “this stuff”.
Episode 31: All About Boundaries with Jules Taylor Shore
We hear a lot about "having boundaries" or "setting boundaries" or "respecting boundaries"... but what does any of this really mean? To answer this question, I invited trauma therapist and boundaries expert, Jules Taylor Shore, to talk all about boundaries.
We hear a lot about "having boundaries" or "setting boundaries" or "respecting boundaries"... but what does any of this really mean?
To answer this question, I invited trauma therapist and boundaries expert, Jules Taylor Shore, to talk all about boundaries. Jules takes this complex topic and explains it in a user-friendly way, so we can better understand ourselves and others.
Episode 30: Like a Tornado of Sticks & Poo
Love addiction gets messy. It's full of intensity, shame, and regression that leads us to behave regretfully, or as I say, 'like a tornado of sticks and poo'.
Love addiction gets messy. It's full of intensity, shame, and regression that leads us to behave regretfully, or as I say, 'like a tornado of sticks and poo'.
In this episode, I celebrate six years in recovery by revisiting Pia Mellody's symptoms of love addiction; and by providing examples of how these symptoms looked for me during nearly three decades of addicted relationships.
Episode 23: The Power of What-if
Have you ever looked back on a past relationship and wondered "What if?: what if things had worked out differently, or I'd been more this/that, or the timing had been better?"
In this episode, Brooke is back to share another dating experience--one that started with a 'what-if' and led to a lot of useful information.
Have you ever looked back on a past relationship and wondered "What if?: what if things had worked out differently, or I'd been more this/that, or the timing had been better?"
For those of us with a history of love addiction, those 'what-ifs' can lead us into fantasy and obsession (and sometimes right back into a dysfunctional relationship). But not all relationships end badly...so why not try again? In this episode, Brooke is back to share another dating experience--one that started with a 'what-if' and led to a lot of useful information.
Episode 22: Enoughing
What is 'enough'? If you've struggled with codependence or love addiction, you might catch yourself feeling 'not enough'; or maybe you're driven to DO more (and more) but it never feels like enough.
What is 'enough'? If you've struggled with codependence or love addiction, you might catch yourself feeling 'not enough'; or maybe you're driven to DO more (and more) but it never feels like enough.
In this episode, I talk about how the pandemic has shifted our concept of what it means to do and be enough and the role that 'enough' played in my love addiction. I also talk about what's to come this year on the podcast!
Episode 11: Best Girlfriend Ever
Love addiction is rooted in codependence; it comes with boundary issues, dependency issues, and self-esteem issues, which leads us to look externally (often to our partners) for a sense of worthiness.
Love addiction is rooted in codependence; it comes with boundary issues, dependency issues, and self-esteem issues, which leads us to look externally (often to our partners) for a sense of worthiness.
In this episode, I discuss my history of trying to prove my value in relationships, and how that led to resentment and more dysfunctional behavior. I also discuss what happens when attachment wounds are triggered and what we can do in those painful moments.
Episode 10: An Interview with Daniel Gowan
What’s it like to grow up as The Hero of the family? Hint: It’s not as awesome as it sounds.
What’s it like to grow up as The Hero of the family? Hint: It’s not as awesome as it sounds. In this episode, I talk with Rev. Daniel Gowan, LPC-S, regarding his upbringing as a Hero and his personal experience with love addiction, avoidance, and codependence. We also discuss his recovery journey, how this led him to Pia Mellody’s work, and how all of it has influenced him as a therapist.
Episode 9: Just So
Do you struggle with consistency? Does your desire to do All The Things - and do them perfectly - get in the way of actually DOING anything at all?
Do you struggle with consistency? Does your desire to do All The Things - and do them perfectly - get in the way of actually DOING anything at all? In this episode, I explore the connection between codependence, love addiction, and the tendency to over-function; how shame feeds our dysfunctional behavior; and how sometimes, even when we think we’re just wasting time, we might actually be learning our most valuable lessons.